Monday, June 13, 2011


I'm beyond frustrated today, and all because I can't find anyone that has their act together.  I have been in the middle of a flare up with painful ulcers in my mouth, migraines, random fevers, and spasms for over two weeks now.  I tried a steroid pack with no relief.  I NEED to get IVIG so that my body will calm down.  It took over a week to get a call back in the first place, and now after a week of getting no answers from the infusion center, I'm told I need to go in to see my doctor. Why?  Nobody will tell me. 

I haven't taken any tests since then, and I have no freaking clue why I need to readdress a treatment plan that is already established.  I have to go downtown tomorrow while I feel like crap and would rather stay in my bed all day.  I hate going to the doctor's office.  Mercy has treated me okay, but Kaiser treated me like a sack of dog poop.  I have serious anxiety issues, and it is hard to handle anything medical because of it.  I got pushed around and was told so many times that I was crazy, making things up, exaggerating, that I needed to just move on, etc.  Nobody will tell me why I need to go in, and that is not making things better.  I could have had the treatment and been feeling 10x better by now.  But no. Of course not.  Nothing goes as planned for me.  

I've been crying on and off all day out of frustration and grief.  Dealing with just one of these issues is enough, but together it renders me a blubbering ball of snot and tears.  Please pray that I can get in for treatment ASAP, and that the appointment will go well tomorrow. 

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